If one of us is cut out to work at paddypower, baby, it's me because we applied at the same time and they hired me not you. / by Dante Sacomani

Holy shit stop what you are doing and go over the Bishops Finger pub in Canterbury right now.

There are about 30 or 40 guys in there with black suits on and matching pocket kerchiefs. Today is St. Georges day and they all have lapel pins that resemble the flag of their country. One man is drinking a white wine and taking hell for it because it is not a pint of something far weaker. They all ordered the roast. I hope I don't find out these men are racists.

Each guy has his own briefcase that is black and rectangular and has a brass combination lock on it. I don't know why but they have lined all of them up below the bar. I should go read this collection of Claire Vaye Watkins stories somewhere else because the bar is packed with these assholes now and whatever man you can have the table fine. Jesus okay okay chill out I am going. Contact me on Google plus so we can talk about how I can join your club because I have these papers and need a briefcase to take them with me in.